How to Care for Your Breastfeeding Mama Friend (Or Yourself!)

We all like to think we are warrior women.  That we can do it all, and then some, while feeding our little ones.  However, when I was breastfeeding, I will be honest: there were some things I let slip.  And my own self-care was definitely one of them. Of course, when you’re in the thick of things with a baby, righting the ship and focusing on fixing your levels of self-care can be tricky in and of itself; you can’t fix what you aren’t paying attention to, and you can’t pay attention to what you’re letting slip if you’re letting it slip because you’re fatigued and just…can’t do anything else but survive.

Enter friends.  Thank goodness for friends.  My mom friends were my lifeline during breastfeeding (and all of motherhood, frankly; they still are!), and without them I would have struggled so much more.  

Here are some things that you can do for your own breastfeeding mama friends (or directly for yourself!)

1. Send a care package of snacks.  Lactation cookies, packs of pretzels, rice cakes, sunbutter cups…whatever treats your mama friend (or you…) enjoy, send a care package of those.  I know when I was breastfeeding, feeding myself was a struggle; I was using my lunch breaks to pump, and often let eating a real meal go by the wayside…and if I forgot my granola bars and such, I was just out of luck.  It was hard. Snacks made it easier.
2. Figure out when your mama friend does her pumping if she’s pumping at work, and try to text her funny gifs and comics during that time.
3. Offer to bring her a meal some random weekend, far out from the initial meal train that might have happened when she first had that little bundle of joy.
4. Offer to take her other kids to library storytime with you so she can have a little one-on-one time with her littlest. If she’s lucky, maybe a nap if the baby naps…
5. Be a teatime friend by sending her special mother’s milk tea.  
6. Just listen if she needs to vent.
7. Encourage her if she’s feeling down, without pressuring her or her body, or comparing her experience to yours.  And if this is self-care for yourself, remember: your journey is yours alone, and shouldn’t be held up to the standard of some other mom.
8. Get her a nursing-friendly swimsuit and suggest you go swimming together — you can trade the baby!
9. Make up silly songs that fit the rhythm of her breast pump, if she’s pumping.  
10. Bake her a cake when she’s finished breastfeeding.  She deserves it. You do, too. Thank you for being a friend!